The Lines Between Parenting and Disrespect
CEO and Founder Stephanie C is here yet again writing about a difficult and yet heartbreaking circumstance that often occurs between grown Children and Parents. This challenge is sometimes masked by the disrespected individual all too well. This article touches on the toxicity of the relationships between Parenting and Grown Children.
It’s always difficult when you have grown children disrespecting you in your home. We sometimes create the environment by allowing this to go on for a long time for fear of loosing the ones we love, but at what lengths do we encapsulate the dishonor of disrespect, the name calling, the anger that comes along with it. It’s not “cute” at 4, why would it be any cuter as an adult child over 18.
Parents feel powerless when they cannot enforce rules with an older child, some may say “put them out” but we know all too well the reality of carrying it through. I have spoken to quite a few parents and the challenges are real when adult children are still in your home. The solution some may say are setting boundaries. Parents set boundaries every day, do we enforce those boundaries, sometimes? We know that grown children have their own stresses and sometimes feel like they have no one to talk to, but we must manage our own stresses and feelings of emotions.
The sacrifices, time, energy, and commitment that you’ve poured into them, giving them the tools, and empowering them to become outstanding citizens, leaving yourself undone many times. Parents can sometimes receive this as ungrateful, unappreciated, and quite fearful depending on the aggressiveness of the disrespect. Where does the disrespect towards a parent come from and is it developed over a period? If you can pinpoint the time frame, then maybe that’s a start.
Sometimes an “I Love You” is just not enough, it takes so much more to mend a Parent’s hurting heart, even more so for the single parents out there that’s trying to make it all happen. Grown children may feel like they’re constantly treated as a child and to show that they’re not, they lash out to whomever is in the home, which for the most part of is you.
Every tear that a Parent shed, comes from the loins of her soul, good or bad.
At what point do you start locking your bedroom door at night or staying extremely late at work or finding anything to do but come home, trying to avoid any form of confrontation. The lack of respect for yourself kicks in, the feeling of anxiety, insecurity, depression, not wanting to make a sound in the home, not speaking too loud on the phone. You’re confronted with the reality that your Grown Child is just that. A Grown Child trying to find their place in Society, but taking you with them.
Scientists suggest that the adolescent brain continues to mature well past their 20s. Is that an excuse for disrespect towards the only person that wants you to succeed? That is the question that crowds the mind.
Here are just a few Identities causes and Hostility that may resonate with the disrespect of a Grown Child in the home:
- Undeveloped brain
- Stressful school, home, or work environment
- Having to accept responsibilities
- Disappointed with their Life
- Mental Issues (seek professional help)
- A Substance Addiction Problem (seek professional help)
- Criticized or Judged
In closing, always accept and acknowledge your role in whatever hurt your child feels.
Melanin Power Mag